December 6, 2020

Why Are Women So Hard On Themselves?

Why Are Women So Hard On Themselves?

Why Are Women So Hard On Themselves?

Last week I shared a photo of me from 1981 on Instagram and Facebook. It only showed me from the underarms up but I had makeup on and I’d obviously curled my hair. I was leaning over the sink, just finishing giving my 2 months old his bath in the kitchen sink. Remember those days? No fancy plastic tubs in our house… the child went from the kitchen sink to the bathtub.Jennifer Connolly of A Well Styled Life at 24

Jennifer Connolly of A Well Styled Life at 24

Anyway, I commented that although I knew I was terribly sleep-deprived, I bothered with my appearance because that’s just the way I roll.

One commenter asked me if spending time to look “well turned out” was worth it, at the time.
Another said she was overweight after the birth of her children so didn’t make an effort.
This got me thinking about how different we all are.

I answered that yes, it was absolutely worth taking the time to fix myself up because that allowed me to feel better about myself. I had yet to shed my 65-pound pregnancy weight gain, but taking some small steps for my appearance helped boost my confidence.

This act of self-care is a shield against the darts life can throw at us. Even the ones we throw at ourselves. And why are we women so hard on ourselves?

Many women commented on how hard they had been on their younger selves and wished they hadn’t been. They thought they were too heavy then…except now they are much heavier, so why didn’t they appreciate themselves more then? And what will they be saying to their current self, in five, or ten years’ time – looking back?

Do we take shots at ourselves as a defense mechanism, before someone else gets the chance? Do we think that by lowering ourselves or making ourselves smaller – we’ll be encouraged to do or be “better”?

One woman commented – “why was I in such a hurry to grow up? Why didn’t I celebrate more of my youth?”

This has me thinking, about how we talk to ourselves, our daughters, each other. About the importance of positivity and loving ourselves for who we are, and now. Taking steps – whatever that looks like, to take care of ourselves. And not putting it off, or hurrying past.

What are your thoughts?

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Back to Top